Tag Archive | dancing

Dancing, drama, and a quickie (party #2)

inthemoodforaquickie

On the way to the second party of the night, the Host warned me that the old guy and his wife, who have been at all of his other parties, would be there.  I was a little leery as to why he was telling me this and asked if they were spending the night.  He said no, and that he knew I didn’t like the older man.  In hindsight, I’m going to guess that this was his way of letting me know he wasn’t planning on giving me much attention.

He dropped me off at a table with these people, as soon as we arrived, and the redhead girl from the former parties, and then barely spoke to me until it was time to leave.  I tried to be friendly, but they were decidedly unwelcoming.  The old guy didn’t even look my direction and the redhead didn’t say much.  The other girl, well, later I heard her talking ABOUT me, and about how I was going to move up there, but she wasn’t saying anything directly TO me.

Wow.  Okay.  I felt like we were in junior high or something.  I’m pretty sure there was some jealousy involved because the one girl was making a point of talking loudly about her relationship to the Host and how he said she was special to him and that her husband knew and accepted all of this.  I mostly just ignored them and went off to do my thing, though I did see them looking at me a few times when I was dancing with different guys.  They stayed sitting at the table pretty much the entire time, with the redhead sometimes sitting on the old guy’s lap.

Rather than worry about feeling excluded, I just talked with the Mexican girls at the next table over, who were nice, and got up and walked around.  I was making my way to the restroom, when I slipped and almost fell on something wet on the floor.  The people whose table I was in front of stopped to talk with me a bit and tease me about my mishap.

This guy looked kind of like Don Knotts.  His wife was blonde and cute though.  They were with another couple and they all said they thought I was Mexican, because I was over there hanging with the Mexicans.  It wouldn’t be the first time people have thought that either, lol.

They asked who I had come there with and I pointed out the Host, who was off talking with people.  The Don Knotts looking guy said “oh, I heard he is the ‘exception to the rule'” (wink, wink).  I’m pretty sure he was referring to his endowment, and I was thinking, I can’t believe he just said that, but played dumb, like I had no clue what he meant.  Mr. Host may not be that well endowed, but he’s pretty damn good in bed.  I’m sure as hell not complaining! Honestly, he’s just as good, if not better, than a lot of guys that are more so.

Shortly after that, a man asked me to dance.  He was a tall, slightly older, black man with a streak of gray in his hair.  I would  guess him to be in his late 40’s.  He said this was his first time at one of these parties and claimed not to remember having made a profile on the swinger site.  I’m not sure how he got in otherwise, though. 

We danced to a couple songs, then he wanted to go check out some of the rooms at the club.  They have public and private rooms where people can have sex.  I’d been to this place before with Mr. Motorcycle, but it was a different club and they were charging for private rooms.  This one, they were free.

He pulled me into a private room and closed and locked the door.  We took off our clothes and fucked on the couch.  He wore a magnum condom that I don’t think he needed and it lasted about 30 seconds, before he came.  We got dressed and left the room, pretending like nothing had happened. He later asked me to dance again and was raving about the “great time” we had together.

A few minutes later, I was walking near that same room and a Mexican guy aggressively grabbed and started kissing me.  I was pulling away and the Host walks out of the nearby room that is set aside for smokers.  He walked up to me and took my arm, telling the guy I’d talk to him “later”.  He said to me “see, I am always watching you, always looking out for you, I don’t miss a thing”.  I was thinking yeah, except for the fact that I just fucked someone in that same room like 5 minutes ago, lol.

So I sit down for a minute at our table and am sipping on my drink when a tall, biracial guy walks by and pulls on my hair.  I ignored him so he walks back and pulls it again.  I’m kinda giving him a “leave me alone” look, and look back at my drink,so he goes up to the redhead and does the same thing.  She ignores him and looks away too.  Then he walks up behind the woman that is all into Mr. Host and grabs her ass. 

She flipped and told him to back off.  Her husband comes charging at the guy and a bunch of people have to hold him back.  Mr. Host gets in the middle of it all and starts trying to talk to the mixed man, while the security guys are running in.  Presumably, he was explaining that this was inappropriate.  The guy was yelling but I couldn’t hear what Mr. Host was saying. 

It took seemingly forever and lots of talking, between this guy, Mr. Host and the security guys but finally this man was asked to leave the party.  As he is heading out to the parking lot, his girlfriend flips out, something about him having her credit cards on him, and punches him in the face! 

Everyone is standing there waiting to see if he would hit her back, but he kept his arms down at his side, even though they were screaming at one another.  Finally, she got into her car and took off.  I don’t know what he did after that, but he wasn’t allowed back in the club.

Back at the table, this girl whose ass he grabbed is going on about how her husband had her back but COMPLAINING about Mr. Host not getting upset enough.  WTF?  I’m thinking, if anything, he was overreacting.  He was way involved in the situation and really all the guy did was grab her ass.  I’ve had that happen multiple times at swinger parties and never made a scene about it.  He shouldn’t have, but really, after she said something, he backed off. So it didn’t need to turn into a 5 alarm emergency.  She was clearly enjoying all the drama and attention directed at her.

I drifted away from all the drama and a 27 year old white guy asked me to dance.  He was telling me he had never been to a swinger party before but had decided to come here when he was moping about his ex and thinking that she was probably fucking other people.  He said the idea turned him on and somehow that led him to decide to try a swinger party tonight.  I wasn’t into this guy but was listening to his story and basically humoring him.  He was okay looking, I just wasn’t that attracted.

We sat at a table, drinking for a few minutes and then he said something about wanting to look around so we walked past some of the public sex rooms.  He invited me into one and I was hesitant.  Mr. Host was standing a few feet away, with his back to me, talking to people and I was kind of hoping he would see and help get me out of this situation, but he didn’t. 

I was holding back and the guy was like come on, we can just go sit in there and watch.  There were a few couples in there but they weren’t doing anything more than kissing.  I reluctantly walked in the room with him and sat on the couch.  He didn’t try anything at first and I was watching the porn on the big screen and noticing that there were several single guys standing outside the door, staring (they aren’t allowed to come in unless they are with a woman or couple).  It was a bit creepy.  They were like hungry vultures, looking at some prey, lol.

I was using their staring as my excuse not to engage with this guy when he started trying to kiss on my neck.  I would pull away from him but he just kept going for it.  I noticed he had a quarter sized hole in the crotch of his jeans and I was like WTF?  lol  He pulled me on his lap and was kissing my neck and rubbing my shoulders. I was feeling really uncomfortable and it was obvious because one of the Mexican guys, who was standing in the doorway, later told me I really looked like I didn’t want to be in there.  He questioned “you didn’t like that guy did you?” when we were dancing. 

I finally said something about how I needed to go talk to Mr. Host and got up and walked out of the room, leaving the poor guy behind.  Mr. Host was in another room, talking and goofing off with one of the club owner’s wives, so I didn’t actually talk to him but sat down at our table. 

Her husband came up to me.  He said he remembered me coming to his club with the Pilot.  I was like “oooh, you are good, you even remember who I was with” and he said yeah, the Pilot is one of his friends.  I’m pretty sure, at the time, the Pilot had been talking about arranging something with these people, but the guy actually seems kinda shy.

Anyhow, his wife, and a bunch of the Mexican girls, wanted me to come out and dance, so I did.  A lot of dancing after that, the Mexican folks were a bunch of party animals, lol.  I danced with the girls, danced with different guys, danced on the pole with a bunch of girls, danced on a pole by myself and finally sat down, exhausted, in my chair.  So this Mexican girl comes over and gives me a lap dance, and all these guys are watching. 

She was asking if I wanted to come to their after party later and I said I wasn’t sure, I was just going wherever Mr. Host was.  Some of the other Mexican folks went over and talked to him and came back saying he was “definitely” coming to party with them, so I would be too.  It was like 3 in the morning and I was honestly pretty tired and not feeling in the mood for that but I didn’t say so.

Finally, Mr. Host comes over and asks me do I want to go with the Mexicans or just come back to his house for some “alone time”.  I was going to say “alone time” but then he asked me if I had “gotten mine” yet.  I said “a little bit” and he was like “a little??” I’m pretty sure he thought since I’d been gone a long time (with that white guy) that I must have been fucking someone.  I was, of course, referring to the 30 second fuck I’d had earlier, lol.

So he says hold on a minute and goes over to talk to these biker people.  He came back and said I tell you what, we are going to take them back to the house for “a little fun” and then we can kick them out and it will just be you and me.

 I took one look at these people and said “I am not fucking any of those guys”.  The guys had long, Duck Dynasty beards and fucked up teeth.  They were definitely not my type.  Mr. Host said “oh, no, I would NEVER expect you to do that” and that now I am going to find out about his “bad side”.  He said they were just coming over to smoke a little weed. He again joked about me getting my “30 seconds” later (if only he knew…)

I’m like, okay whatever and one of the couples comes along and gets in his truck with us.  Ugh.  I guess they didn’t have their own vehicle with them and had been drinking.  So I know he’s going to have to take them back home or something later too.  Plus, the guy was just obnoxious.

Anyhow, I’ll tell you all more about it later. 😉  I actually ended up having some fun later in the night, but I promise you it wasn’t with the biker, lmao! 😉

Yes, I’ll have thirds please ;)

halloween3

I’m home from my 3rd Halloween swinger party of the year!  I went to this one with Mr. Motorcycle, in a big city a few hours away.  The party was packed, with close to 500 people, and of course we were all decked out in costume.

I dressed as Silk Spectre from the Watchmen, for anyone who has any clue who that is.  I don’t, but hey, he bought me the costume and it was hot!  LOL  Only one other guy at the party correctly guessed my character.  Someone else thought I was a Power Ranger, LMAO.  Anyhow, it was still a hit. 😉

Here is what the costume looks like:
silk-spectre-ii-costume

I was gonna post a body pic of ME in the costume but some guy I showed it to made a negative comment and now I am feeling self conscious. Not sure if he was just being an ass or what because most of the responses I got were overwhelmingly positive.

 We stayed at a Ramada Inn and there was party bus shuttle service from the hotel (and like 3 other ones) to the club.  Unfortunately I had been running a bit late…  Okay, more than a bit, I was 3 hours later than what we’d originally planned and we got into town just past the 9:00 last run for the shuttle, but Mr. Motorcycle thought we could change that.  He was like “just call the driver and ask him to come again at 10:00.  He’s a guy, if you sound sexy enough, he will do it for you”. 

To my surprise that actually worked, lol.  At first the guy said he would be there until 9:30 and couldn’t come back unless there were more people on the bus.  Then he later called me back and offered to come, just for us, at 10. Woohoo! 

The reason I was running so late in the first place was because of my ex- husband’s girlfriend causing trouble at the last minute, plus the oil light going on in my vehicle and having to wait for an unexpected two hours that morning to get it checked and changed.  Ugh.  My life is way too busy to be adding in extra problems like that but it is what it is. 

The ex’s girlfriend suddenly decides, about 30 minutes before I was due to bring the kids to their dads for an overnight, that she has other plans for the weekend.  I had asked him on Monday, and checked to make sure on Tuesday, that bringing them so I could go out of town would be alright.  He said that was fine but apparently never mentioned it to her, and now she was taking it out on ME. 

Drama, drama, drama.  I told her they need to communicate better and that it wasn’t my responsibility and she started going off.  She said I needed to bring food for them and I said I would but that our divorce decree states that he is supposed to provide food when they are visiting.  She said she didn’t care what it said, it is her house and she isn’t feeding them her food.  So whatever, I spent my time waiting on an oil change at Walmart buying food for them for the weekend.

Then she starts bitching at me about how she isn’t going to change her plans for me and that she is the one in control of the house and what she says goes and they can’t come there.  I said okay then, he can come to my house and watch the kids there and it won’t interrupt your plans.  She flipped out and said “OH HELL NO!!”  I was like, I am not going to be there, I will be out of town, so I don’t see the big deal, but okay.  The woman is insanely jealous of me for some reason, despite the fact that I wouldn’t touch my ex with a ten foot pole, and have tried to explain that to her.

I tried to text my ex and just communicate with him from then on but he wasn’t very helpful and acted like he had no idea what was going on.  Then she accuses me of forwarding her texts to him (which I didn’t do, though I did tell him the gist of what she was saying).  Ugggghhh…  she did finally calm down and he said it was okay to bring them but it made me even later and later trying to get it all sorted out. 

After promising not to bring the kids next weekend (she apparently didn’t like that this is the 3rd time this month they have stayed the night there, though technically they are supposed to stay 4 nights out of the month),I said I don’t want my children feeling unwelcome at your house.  She didn’t comment. I made my ex promise that wouldn’t happen and told the kids to call me if there was any trouble and I would turn around and come home.  Not a good way to start off my trip, but she did later apologize.

Mr. Motorcycle was surprisingly forgiving.  I felt bad because he actually sat and waited for me in a parking lot for 2 hours but he was just glad to be heading out.  We had a good drive and on the way discussed how we would act at the party.  He said he wanted us to be a “couple” and only play if we play together and both agree.  I was fine with that.

There was some possibility that The Referee would be at this party.  He had originally invited me first, before changing his mind and deciding he couldn’t make it up this weekend.  When he found out I was going with someone else he said that he was a little jealous and might make the trip up anyhow.  He didn’t though.

It was okay, because I had seen him earlier in the week, for a hot little lunchtime rendezvous.  He says he wants to try and do that at least once a week, despite it being an almost 2 hour drive for him.  Hey, that works for me!!  He had gotten a cheap motel because the Marriot was booked. 

It was actually kind of funny because while we were fucking the non- English speaking guy that worked the front desk had come by and OPENED our door, because we left the key in it by accident and he wanted to give it to us.  That was his excuse anyhow.  He knocked for about two seconds and then tried to OPEN the freaking door before the Referee slammed it back in his face.  I know he could hear us in there!  We could hear the people next door to us fucking loudly too….LMAO. 

The Referee I am liking quite a bit.  I can tell he’s not too thrilled about me going to parties with someone else but he hasn’t told me not to.  He did ask if I gave the guy anal and of course I didn’t.  I haven’t given it to him either but he is wanting me to.  He’s like “you can save that for Daddy”.  I don’t know about all that…

So back to the party.  It was packed to the hilt for Halloween and a lot of fun.  We flirted and talked to a bunch of people and danced the night away.  On the bus over there Mr. Motorcycle had said something about wanting to see me someday in a gangbang.  So romantic…

The music was ten times better at this party than the others I have been to. There were more good looking people than at most of the ones down here. I recognized a handful of people and was half expecting to see the Pilot there.  We were close to where he lives, and I know he has been there before, but he wasn’t signed up and no sign of him. 

However, I did run into a couple of people that have seen him with me in the past.  I also met the couple he had wanted me to stay in a hotel room with originally when we had our big blowout.  The girl was much more attractive in person than she had seemed in her online pics.  She wasn’t smoking hot but Mr. Motorcycle seemed kind of interested and he liked her costume (football cheerleader).

It was her birthday and at some point we walked into a room where she was getting gangbanged by a few black men on a couch.  I didn’t stick around to watch that very long but later on, near the end of the night, Mr. Motorcycle stops and tells me to ask her boyfriend to dance.  I did and he was all excited about it and wanting us to come back to their hotel and hook up.  Since he asked me to get this guy on the dance floor I thought that was what Mr. Motorcycle was wanting too, but when the guy invited us to come over he kind of shot him down.

Hmmmm….  He later said he doesn’t know why but he is still kind of having a hard time wanting to share me.  We didn’t end up playing with anyone other than each other.  It was fun though!  He also said he was going to email that couple and try and let them know he wasn’t trying to be rude.

He made some excuses about how he didn’t want to fuck her after she’d been with all those guys that night and I was like, but you have been in gangbangs before, claim to like them and just mentioned wanting to get me in one on the way over here!  That kind of made him think (duh!).  He also said he’d prefer to hook up with women that are on my level of attractiveness.  Yet, beforehand he had been telling me how he can usually find SOMETHING attractive about a woman even if she is not conventionally beautiful.  Men, so confusing. :p

Ah well, we did have a good time and he says he thinks he will be more likely to be able to share in the future.  He just has to get used to it because he’s so gung ho about me at the moment.  I guess we will see.

He does keep telling me how much he likes me and how hot he thinks I am.  He wants to take a million pics.  When we were dancing a song came on that I like and I was singing along and he was like “OH MY GOD…you can SING!!!”  Apparently he was impressed. I don’t claim to be a fabulous singer or anything but I do love to sing, sang in choir growing up and have gotten compliments in the past. Now the Referee, he can blow!!  LOL  He sings a cappella on his voice mail and it is amazing.

I got a chance to dance on the pole and that was fun too.  I was actually dancing on a pole that was off to the side of the room and the DJ saw me and came over and drew attention to it and had me dance on the main pole in front of everyone.  I was just tipsy enough to be in my “happy place” but not overly drunk so had fun with it. 😉 

I almost forgot to mention that I kissed and made out with two women. One at the party, who was half naked, and one on the party bus home. Sheesh, it must be becoming old hat or something. Oh, and then there was the girl that BIT Mr. Motorcycle on the cheek when we got off the bus to the hotel. WTF?? Some people have the strangest ways of flirting. He did NOT appreciate that!!

There were a couple of times when Mr. Motorcycle did or said things that seemed kind of controlling.  Like he asked me to sit at a table and took off (I later found out to smoke, he was hiding the fact that he smokes from me) then seemed kind of perturbed that I had gotten up and went to the restroom. He asked me not to go to this club again unless it is with him and wanted me to agree to that since we have been there together.  He also wants to have a couples profile and has asked me NOT to let him know if I am going to see other men.  It would be reasonable maybe if we were in a relationship but I haven’t really agreed to that.  I’m still trying to take it slow and watch things with him and he seems to be pushing a little too fast.  He’s already seriously trying to plan New Year’s Eve with me.

He bought me another outfit too, a leather bustier and a very short black skirt.  He says he likes to dress women up and take them out on his arm, that he thinks it is sexy.  I know single men in the Lifestyle get much more attention when they have a woman with them so not sure if that’s all it’s about or what.  I did notice he has a couple recent validations on the swinger site that were not from either of the parties he and I went to.  For all his claims not to have been fucking anyone else, I have my doubts.  I tried to put him on the spot and ask his age again to see what he’d say (since I found out he is 44 and before he tried to tell me 40) and he dodged the question.  All in all, I think I need to keep in the back of my mind at least that he is not super trustworthy.

 

Pole dancing and picking up girlfriends

poledance

Meeting guys is easy. Dating sites, sex sites, Craigslist, bars, walking through the grocery store, you name it, there are all sorts of places to meet men. I tend to get hit on pretty frequently when I am out without my children, and sometimes when I have them with me. Not necessarily by anyone I WANT to be hit on by, lol, but whatever, it still boosts my ego.

Not that I am out very often sans kids. It’s quite rare, actually. They are mostly attached to my hip when I’m in public. So that hampers things a bit too. In the event that a guy talks to me with my kids standing there, I am much more reserved and unlikely to show interest. That hasn’t stopped a random guy from KISSING me in the grocery store parking lot awhile back (while my kids were in the van after he followed us out)and occasional men hounding for my number or simply talking and appearing interested. My 13 year old son sometimes points out his observations to me. “That guy likes you”. Yeah, HE can even tell, lol.

I’m not horrible looking or anything but I also don’t look like a supermodel. I think the reason I get hit on a lot probably has more to do with the fact that I smile a lot and maybe look “approachable”. I’m generally polite and friendly to strangers. Sometimes guys take this to mean more than it actually does.

One of my sisters, who is quite attractive, claims men rarely talk to her. I think in her case it has more to do with the fact that she appears “closed” and brushes people off. She’s not as open and warm. If I didn’t know her I wouldn’t talk to her either. I’d be afraid she’d tell me off, lol.

In any case, I find meeting men to basically be a piece of cake. If I want to go on a date, I just go glance through the zillions of emails I have on Plenty of Fish or OkCupid and pick a few to respond to on a night I have free. Usually at least one will ask me out right then. OR I throw out a Craigslist ad and generally get several responses before they flag and take it down. Then there’s the swinger site and an occasional option there that seems interesting. That doesn’t always wield great results, but hey it’s easy to at least find a guy who wants to meet.

They’re everywhere, even if the ones I genuinely LIKE and have good chemistry with are fewer and farther between. I’ve heard the statistic somewhere that there are 500 men for every woman on online dating sites! I don’t know if that’s actually the case but there are definitely a lot of fish in the sea, whether they are good catches or not. Of course, I also have a few men in my life that I like and have available for sex already, even though they don’t all live close by. So generally, guys are easy.

Now WOMEN on the other hand, are really difficult. I’m not even talking about for sex. Men complain about that I know, but I’m just talking friendship. It’s really hard for me to meet female friends. Ladies, you know how we are. Often cliquish and reluctant to let a new woman into the fold.

Don’t get me wrong, I have women friends that I’ve known since childhood and I have sisters. They all live far away, though it’s great to talk on the phone and have an occasional visit. The women I know around here are mostly people I knew during the years I was married to a man in ministry. So that means they are hardcore Conservative Christians. Most of them are married. I’m the odd woman out.

Anyway, despite the male attention, I really MISS having some girlfriends to hang out with! When the Professor goes on his guys nights out (he plays poker with some guy friends once in a while and not too long ago took a road trip to watch a football game, stuff like that), I’m happy for him but it also makes me wish even more that I had some female company as well. The problem is where to find some!

I’m not really in a position to go out often without my children. I used to be in MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) and met a lot of women there but it also has that Christian focus. Lovely ladies and we had fun but they aren’t women I can let down with and enjoy a glass of wine or more adult activities. I also felt that pressure to put on a certain “face” and be that perfect wife and mother around them. When I got divorced I felt a little bit ostracized. The same was very much true for my experience with women in the church. Suddenly my “friends” weren’t so “friendly” anymore, now that I am divorced. That was a part of why we dipped out of church and all its accompanying fakeness.

Shortly after my divorce I wanted to meet some other single females to hang out with that were more my speed so I tried a local Meetup group. I met with a couple of ladies for drinks and it was fairly nice but they were all married and a bit boring. Still I would have gone out with them again if my ex- husband’s schedule hadn’t changed to where he wasn’t taking the children in the evenings. Due to that I was unable to attend meetings for quite a while and they dropped me from the list. 😦 Finding and affording childcare for me to have time to go out is generally difficult.

Anyway, the last time the Professor had a men’s poker night and was sending me pics of the guys playing and stuff I told him I really wished I had a way to meet some other women and he had a great (and obvious- duh!) idea! He said what about at the gym? I was like I never talk to women at the gym, we are mostly just on our own machines working out with headphones on. He said what about taking a class?

The wheels started turning, how could I not have thought about that?? I work out daily anyway and have a membership at the YMCA. There is free childcare there and plenty of classes offered. I’d seen some aerobic dance classes going on a while back and even seen friends of mine post stuff on Facebook about Zumba, which totally sounded like my cup of tea! I love doing dance style workouts at home.

I immediately went down and got a schedule and they offer Crossfit and Zumba and Pilates and a few other different classes. The Zumba classes are offered in the evenings at a time that would be great for me and you don’t have to sign up but just show up whenever you want to come. PERFECT! 🙂 I went to three classes last week and really enjoyed it. Decent music and the moves are fun and easy to follow. The women seemed nice though the instructor one of the days and another woman were going on about a great worship service at church, so yeah, more church ladies but maybe not everyone.

Anyhow, the Professor made another comment about me liking my pole dancing experience at the last swinger party and he wondered if they offered classes about that. Of course the Y here doesn’t. They have classes that only play Contemporary Christian music though. Gagging here, that is like the worst music ever. I can’t STAND Contemporary Christian music, even all those years in church. I’d much rather listen to gospel or hymns or praise and worship music than Contemporary Christian, it just SUCKS, lol. It all sounds the same and is just horrible. One of the reasons I was turned off by one guy I had sex with a couple of times was because he insisted on blasting this horrible sounding music by Creed in the car when he was driving and telling me how great it was. YUCK!! How can anyone listen to that shit? But I digress…

So anyway, I decided to look online for pole dancing classes in this area. At first I couldn’t find anything and thought it was a hopeless search. THEN I finally came across a place a few miles out of town that offers some pole dancing classes that are a combination of that with belly dancing, yoga, pilates and some other stuff. The whole place sounded really hippy and New Age, but kind of intriguing. They were very mysterious as to what they actually do there, only women are allowed and it’s way out in the middle of nowhere on some kind of renovated farm down a dirt road. The descriptions were very mystical.

The intro class was only $25. I had to try it, to see what this place was all about. Since my ex hadn’t taken the kids the previous weekend I had a reason to ask him to take them during the week too so I made an appointment.

Last night I dropped off the children and drove for about thirty minutes in the sleet down dark country roads looking for this place. I finally found it. There were some sort of creepy decorations on the gate and I drove down a long gravel drive to park outside the building where it would be held. Honestly I was feeling slightly afraid. Like, are these actually serial killers? Why is it way out in the middle of nowhere, why are they so secretive about what they do and why is it only women? It was dark and raining ice and that didn’t help. However, when I pulled up there was another woman arriving at the same time who had never been there before. We weren’t sure if we were even in the right spot because there were several buildings but decided to walk up the stone path to what looked like a remodeled cabin or garage of some sort.

Walking through the door we were greeted by a receptionist in a very relaxing, spa-like atmosphere and asked to fill out some forms. We joined two other girls who were doing the same, on some nice comfortable couches. On the wall were nude paintings of men and women dancing and sitting on park benches. I picked up what looked like a mint out of a bowl on the front desk, unwrapped it and popped it in my mouth. It tasted like some sort of organic horehound candy and was spicy too. Blech…

The papers I filled out were at first basic and then I had to sign some interesting forms promising not to share the secrets of what I did and learned there. So I have to be a bit vague, even with you all, sorry! I could hear the strains of “Dirty Diana” playing in the adjoining room before seeing the women in the previous class leave. Like us, there were only about 4 of them, one older woman maybe in her early 40’s and a few twenty- somethings.

The women in my class were in their early and late twenties or so, other than me, but I didn’t feel out of place. The instructor was older than me and the website made sure to assure us that all body types and ages were more than welcome. A few of us needed to use the restroom, so we had to leave the building and walk through the cold, wet weather into an adjoining building, past screaming cats in a garage and into what appeared to be someone’s house and laundry room. The mirror in the restroom was completely covered with little notes saying things like “you are a Goddess” and “your body is beautiful”.

We returned to the main building. Once we got signed in we were asked to leave our coats and purses and shoes in cubby holes and were taken into a darkened room with a few stripper poles and sat down on mats on the floor. The instructor was joined by the woman who was behind the desk.

The room and the atmosphere, I can only describe as very unique, yet inviting and warm and relaxing. There was a fake gas fireplace and dim red and yellow lanterns adorned the ceiling. No mirrors, any windows were completely covered with very dark curtains. It was sort of like being in a cave and had this Wiccan or Pagan “feel” to it. It reminded me a bit of when I was a kid and my grandmother used to take me to a hippy Sufi “church”, where we would light candles and chant.

We went around the room giving brief introductions and backgrounds. One woman had been in the military and wanted to get more in touch with her feminine side. The other two had previous experience in dance (not the erotic kind) and wanted to regain their skill in some way and learn something new. Me, I simply cited curiousity.

Anyhow, what transpired after that, I can’t really describe. We did a lot of relaxing exercises set to music that put you in a somewhat trancelike state, but it was both sexy and a bit like meditation. I actually enjoyed it quite a bit. It was nice to let go of all the stress of the week and get lost in this new experience.

Then we got to work learning some sexy stances and exercises and trying a new trick on the poles. They had a couple of regular poles and a spinning one as well. It was amazingly easy to me (though they said they don’t start out with the “easy” moves necessarily) but also fun. I got compliments from the instructors on my gracefulness and ease and the way my long hair looked spinning around on the pole. No one said anything negative to anyone. One woman (the military girl) struggled with a bit of awkwardness but was only given encouragement and helpful tips. There was a lot of cheering on and positive reinforcement.

Afterwards we sat on a soft couch together and watched as the instructors did a demo of what we would learn if we take the regular course. It was mesmerizing, entrancing and something I would definitely like to try! I’m waiting for a little bit of tax money to come in and then pretty sure I will enroll in a short course. It’s really not too expensive and I think it will be a lot of fun. They offer courses at several different times. I think it’ll be awesome, relaxing, a bit empowering and maybe I’ll get to meet new friends too, not to mention learn a few skills that I may get a chance to show off at some point, like at one of the swinger parties. They almost always have a stripper pole standing around somewhere.

Between that and Zumba I at least have a running start in meeting new girlfriends. Women can be hard to get to know sometimes and I realize that in general around here I don’t fit in. I actually feel kinda bad because back when I first got divorced I remember a woman emailing me on OkCupid saying she was really just looking for friendship and didn’t know where to start. I didn’t email her back because at that time she seemed needy and I had a lot on my plate plus it seemed a little odd, but maybe she was just someone like me, who didn’t know where to find other women to relate to! Hopefully things worked out for her and soon will for me as well. 🙂