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My fantasies come true!

arrival

So remember last time, how positively SURE I was that I had found evidence that the CEO is married? I’m struggling now, with doubts. What if I was wrong?

Yes, I found a picture of him, posted shortly before we met, with his wedding ring on, the mother of his child and her family. That should be proof enough, shouldn’t it? You would think.

Only, he’s just so CONVINCING when he talks to me. Can a man really be THAT good of a liar?! This most recent rendezvous, he mentioned his “ex” (and he calls her that) several times. He even made a comment, saying “that’s why I left her”.

He also told me he’d been in China. I’d assumed he was lying because Tinder showed him as being 10 miles away during that time. Yet, when we got together again, he was COMPLAINING about having to haggle for prices when he was in China. If he’s a liar, he’s a damn good one!

What if….what if I’m completely wrong about him? What if that picture was taken previously and someone just re-posted it? Could I be convincing myself he’s a cheater because of my general mistrust of men? Maybe its easier for me to believe he is untrustworthy, than to open myself up to the possibility of getting hurt.

Perception is such a big thing. I could be making up an elaborate story in my head, because it fulfills some sort of fantasy for ME. Maybe the idea of a torrid, illicit, affair just turns me on! 😉 Or maybe, I’m totally on the mark and just trying to make excuses for him because I like him so much. :p He DOES behave like a married man and I haven’t ever been to his place!

There is just something deliciously sexy about the idea of sleeping with a taken man. So sue me, I get wet over the naughtiness of it all! Playing the mistress role for a little bit can feel kind of… intoxicating.

Sigh…in any case our last rendezvous was absolutely DREAMY! 🙂 He was doing work in a southern state and he decided to fly me to him for a hot overnight! Unfortunately, I couldn’t make arrangements to stay longer, since he notified me at the last minute, but he had said I could stay for up to a week.

I hadn’t heard from him in like 3 weeks and he just popped up out of the blue and suggested this trip. He didn’t really even ASK if I wanted to come, just stated that he was planning on flying me out on Saturday to be with him. Fortunately, I happened to have the weekend free!

He did mention that he’d been in China, and he said he’d missed me. I never know though, with him, whether I will hear from him or not. I don’t go out of my way to contact him, just wait and see what happens. Telling myself he is married at least gives me a way to make sense out of it all.  Meanwhile, he’s the fantasy mystery guy.

It was so exciting and I felt like a princess!! He flew me business select and I got to be practically the first person on the plane each time. I don’t know if he paid or used his companion miles but I saw what the tickets cost when he sent me the choices for when I could come and return. Two one way tickets, would have been about $700. Not that that’s probably not pocket change to HIM, lol, but it would be a big deal to me!

I love, love, love traveling, even when its just a short little jaunt to someplace new! It’s so fun for me and I don’t get to do it often. When I arrived, he took me out to a really nice seafood restaurant for dinner too! Yum!!

The discussion was interesting and he really is a fascinating man. He’s like an extreme caricature of what I would consider “masculine”. Sometimes I find his thinking to be very overly logical and black and white, but he is incredibly intelligent and it shows.

He’s also so, so, soooo incredibly masculine and dominant in the bedroom!! He’s absolutely PERFECT in the sack. WOW! I can’t get over how much he turns me on!! He’s like the perfect combination of super dominant and super giving, that I absolutely LOVE!

He’s so good that I still let him go for anal, even though it hurts like hell and we haven’t been able to do it for very long, lol. 😉 It’s still not my favorite activity but by the time he tries it I’m usually drowning in oxytocin and wanting to give him anything and everything.

The last time (not this one) he even brought lube, and a toy! He said Trojan had been at some convention he was at and he bought this little vibrator. It was awesome!! He pulled it out and surprised me during sex, whispering in my ear that he had gotten me a little surprise. Just the tone of his voice when he said that to me STILL gives me tingles all through my pussy.

It was brand new, in the box. He ended up having to go and get a knife to open it, lol. Yet, he didn’t give it to me afterwards. I wonder what he did with it? Did he give it to his wife? Another woman? Throw it away? Hmmmm….haha

Anyway, he used it on me in multiple ways during sex and it felt sooo good. Then he lubed up my ass and used it on my clit during anal. It probably made it a little easier but it still hurt and I still bled after. We didn’t do it for very long.

This time, on our trip, we didn’t do all that, but I FINALLY got to experience HIM having an orgasm. He didn’t even cum with me the first 4 times we had sex, even after HOURS of fucking and blow jobs. I was trying to play it cool but it had me a little worried!

This time he came, after a nice long blow job and then thrusting really hard and fast while I was on my stomach. I figure maybe he was afraid to be that rough with me in the beginning. He’s super focused on getting ME off most of the time and probably needed to relax enough to be a bit selfish for a change, and get HIS.

Lest you think the sex was short this time, it wasn’t.  It was down to about 3 1/2 hours though, versus the 5 or 8 the last few times.  It was still amazing and we did have a little anal, though not for too long.  Did I mention how incredibly fantastic he is at going down on me?? Oh MY GOD!  Lol  So many men let that slack after a while.  He even licked my asshole. 😉  No qualms… I love guys like that!

In any case, I was relieved! He came all over my back and down the crack of my ass. Ahhhh… sweet satisfaction! 😉 He cuddled afterwards and was a gentleman all the way till the time he dropped me back off to go home, always opening my car door and all the little things we women love. 🙂 I’m still walking on air…

On another note, I heard again from the Cohort. He texted me at the beginning of the year and said he was thinking of me. He was halfway across the country for a relative’s wedding and it said it made him appreciate me and the time he had with me.

It felt good to hear that, but like every other time he has contacted me, it ended in reliving a lot of grief and pain. It just hurts so much to know he still thinks of me and cares, but not ENOUGH.

I’m still spending a fair amount of time with Radioman. I saw him the day before I left on the plane but I never told him I went anywhere. We see each other at least once a week and often more.

Its funny, sometimes he says things like how he misses having a woman at home, someone to cook for him, to be there to share his day with, to be part of his everyday life. I’m not sure if he’s hinting about that with ME, or not? I like him a lot but I just don’t know if I could go there. There are so many things, like his love of gambling and the way he’s like most men and would not want ME with anyone else, but might end up there himself!

Still, I really do enjoy him and the sex is good. We’ve seen a little more of each other lately because he got my employer to agree to a collaboration with the radio station for the next couple of months. It’s been fun seeing him in a professional setting, as well as in his bed. 😉

Most of the others have fallen by the wayside, at least for the time being. I’m okay with that, especially since its been cold and wintery and I feel more like cuddling in than going out on new dates or with new men. Hope 2016 is going well for all of you!!

Am I dreaming??

Pinch-Me

Somebody pinch me, this man is just unreal!! I’m completely bowled over by the CEO. Maybe I should have called him “Mr. Incredible”, lol. Seriously….Cohort who? Haha Okay, so there are still some residual feelings there, but it is definitely helping me to get past it.

I’m kind of afraid of how hard I’m starting to fall. I really don’t even know what he wants with me. Is he looking for a relationship? Just sex? It’s hard to tell. On one hand maybe its best to assume he just wants sex, so as not to get my hopes up for anything else, but then I don’t want to act like that’s all I want if he wants more. He did wait 4 dates to try anything on me! Not sure what’s up with that!!

In any case, he’s been like, PERFECT so far!! Our last get together was very recent, when he swung back into town for a couple of days. He acted super excited to see me and we had marathon level, EIGHT HOURS LONG sex! Lol

It was through the roof, off the chain, eight hours of complete BLISS!! Maybe that’s why I can’t seem to think straight! 😉 Then when I told him I’d never had sex for THAT long straight, he said “that’s nothing, we could have kept going!!” Wow….

I’m honestly not sure if I could have kept going! Near the end I gave him an HOUR long blow job and my jaw was pretty sore. He never came though and I finally just gave up! I think he would have liked for me to keep going but I was starting to feel frustrated. He did make a comment afterwards that no other woman has ever even gotten him close to cumming with a bj and that I got him to the brink several times. I guess that’s a positive.

He actually never came at all, though he was hard for pretty much the entire time. It’s hard not to feel like a bit of a failure if a guy doesn’t cum but he made me feel so good otherwise that I’m not too bothered by it. I suspect he’s one of those men that focuses so much on his performance and making ME feel good that he doesn’t really relax enough to get there. Or maybe it’s a control thing- his personality overall is very much “in control” and he is the same way in bed. Anyway, hopefully he will eventually.

He definitely made ME cum a bazillion times! He gives incredible oral and is amazing with his dick. And yes….we had anal again. This time it was a little more painful. Still no lube and it was hard for me to take for very long. I tried though and he called me a “trooper” for it. :p

He’s gone again, out of town, but is keeping in touch. Its funny, a couple days after our encounter I happened to check OKCupid and saw that he had emailed me, over a month ago (that’s how often I read my emails on there, lol- and my mailbox is eternally full). It was during the time when we had lost touch because of Tinder failing to work and he had hit me up on OKCupid, saying “hey stranger!! I’ve been looking for you!!”

It’s kind of amusing to me that I was inadvertently playing hard to get with him. Maybe that played a part in his surprising amount of interest in me! I say surprising, because if I’ve ever felt a man was out of my league, it’s this one! Yet he acts like he really likes me and I’m kind of taken aback.

It’s like what would this guy that’s a super successful millionaire want with a poor single mom like me? Not that he knows all my financial woes, but he saw my old minivan, lol. I wanted to crawl through the floor!

He never acts like he thinks he is better than me and he’s actually been very nice. He’s been super patient when I’ve had to show up hours later than expected, saying its no big deal. Yet I can tell that in his work he is brutal. He has no problem putting people out of their jobs if they don’t do things exactly the way he wants. I made a comment about that and he just laughed and said “honey you have no idea”.

I’m not sure what he is like underneath it all and I’m still trying to figure it out. I love that he emailed me on OKCupid because I had a chance to go over and see his answers to some of the questions on there. We were an 85% match. I saw that he is okay with open relationships and that he doesn’t seem bothered by women who have had a lot of sex. That’s a good start anyway!

We were polar opposite on some things, but most of them dealt more with male/female differences. Like he is your extremely masculine, logical type thinker and I’m the super emotional feminine opposite of him. He also took a test that put him as an ESTJ on the Meyers Briggs Scale and I am an ENFP.

Oh, and he is a Capricorn- first time I’ve ever knowingly slept with one of those, lol. I think I just completed fucking someone from every sign of the zodiac, haha. I am a Virgo and we are supposed to be a good match, though I’m not sure how much I’d actually read into that. 😉

I’m just waiting to find out his flaws. So far they seem few and far between. Maybe he’s a bit coldhearted on the job and kind of controlling but that hasn’t seemed to carry over to me, at least not yet. I’m having a hard time with the idea that he could be living a double life or married and lying about it because he just seems so blunt and honest that its hard to picture. I guess time will tell.

Enough about him though, I have to tell you a funny story about Radioman. The other day I went over to his place, kind of late at night. He had left the door unlocked for me and I walked upstairs to his bedroom, where he was sitting in the dark.

He grabbed me by the arm and hissed, “Come here! You have to see this!!” He handed me a a pair of binoculars and pointed across the street at his neighbors window. The light was on, the curtains were open and two people were clearly fucking. Radioman said “he’s been jackhammering her for a good 15 minutes!” He was all excited about it and like “I KNEW my neighbor was a freak!” He even pulled out a SCOPE so the both of us could see at the same time.

It was like something out of the movies, haha. Men really do this?! The woman was white and the man looked to maybe be hispanic. Radioman said he’d suspected she liked men of color. He’s clearly obsessed, lol.

He also commented about what a nosy neighbor she is. He’s clearly oblivious to the irony of that statement! Haha It cracked me up though!

He told me that later on he talked with her and she mentioned being drunk that night. She didn’t seem to suspect that he’d seen anything. Maybe that’s why the curtains were open but sheesh… that’s almost inviting people to look! The bar she had been at is also popular with some of the swingers in this area, or so I’ve heard (its right down the road from where Radioman lives). I didn’t say anything about that though.

They eventually turned off the light and we got to our own activities. 😉 Radioman is still pretty fun but he’s starting to get possessive. He told me he doesn’t want me having sex with anyone else. Only, he said “we don’t have to be boyfriend or girlfriend or anything and if you want to bring other women over that is fine”. I’m so not agreeing to that. Typical.

Oh, and another update- remember the man I fucked after the funeral? A couple times we halfheartedly texted each other and talked of maybe meeting, but it never went anywhere. Then, all of a sudden I see that he is “in a relationship” with a girl I also reconnected with at that funeral! Lol They are like constantly posting pictures together on Facebook and saying how in love and happy they are! That was fast, but I’m not mad. 😉

I also got hit up by the Producer, a few days before his wedding, on the swinger site. I couldn’t respond, but I have no doubt that he plans on cheating. He told me before that the new woman is not open to swinging. Why am I not surprised?

An anal adventure…..

borisk

So many interesting stories to tell, but time to write in my blog has been eluding me. Life has kept me extremely busy lately. Some of it has been working my new job, which I really am enjoying, but I have also been having some play time! Just wait till you hear about my most recent sexscapade!! 🙂

FINALLY, after months of failure to sign in, Tinder started working again on my phone! Yay!! Of course, one of the first people to pop up on my screen was the Cohort. 😦 Reading his profile was excruciatingly painful but I managed to make myself swipe no and move on. We haven’t spoken in over six weeks or seen each other in months and I’m still struggling to get past it and him. Not that its kept me from dating or having sex, but my heart hasn’t been in it.

So of course, right away I went and responded to the poor guy that I left hanging after a wonderful date because the app stopped working! He was happy to hear I hadn’t gotten married and disappeared while he was off on business trips and quickly invited me out again. I still liked him, even though he talked A LOT and only hugged me at the end of the first three dates.

I actually complained to Mr. Firm that I was getting impatient, like, why isn’t this guy trying to fuck me yet?? Lol I was like he’s hot, he’s wealthy, he’s a former college football player, I know he can’t be that shy about making a move! He even made comments about how Tinder was a hook up site, yet, he didn’t seem to be trying to hook up!

I was getting a little frustrated, though it wasn’t like I wasn’t having sex. I’ve been with the Boring guy and Radioman a fair amount of times lately. Radioman has been pretty good in bed too… Sometimes he surprises me with a little kinkiness and he’s done stuff like spank me over his knee (blushing). I saw Chicago once more, and it still just didn’t do it for me. More recently, I got to see Mr. Firm, which was super hot as usual!! I hadn’t seen him in ages and he definitely still wows me in the bedroom! Then there was this new guy that is barely worth a mention, except for he took me to some really expensive restaurants. We did finally have sex but it kind of sucked and I hated the way he kissed. Oh, and the Pilot, he met me one day at work and we snuck away for a quickie (terrible I know) in an empty parking lot. It was fun but that was after I finally slept with this new guy.

I will call him The CEO. He is a big deal boss at his job and flies all over the place. A comment he made after we had sex, makes me pretty sure he is a millionaire. Not really surprising given where he lives and the company that he works for. I did a quick bit of research after that and some of his co-workers are making 7-8 million a year. He’s actually pretty down to earth though and not really flashy about it.

He’s almost too good to be true, good looking with pretty hazel eyes, built like a brick house, quite the gentleman, remembers to text, plans ahead and calls me beautiful…which makes me wonder if he’s hiding a wife somewhere. I guess you can never be sure, but he claims he’s not. We did have our first encounter at a hotel because he said his sister was babysitting his child at his place.

Suspect? Lol Maybe, though who knows, he could be for real. He says women always think that he is married or sleeping around because he travels a lot, but that he is not and doesn’t have all the time to be sleeping around that they think because he is working so much.

That is what he says, though after sex with him, I’m going to say I understand why they think that!! That, and who are all these women that are saying this stuff if he’s not getting around?? LMAO Not that I really care… 😉 He’s away on business trips all the time, out of sight, out of mind. 🙂

So, our first night together, he invited me back to a hotel room he had rented for the sole purpose of our “date”. It was a very nice hotel, almost more like a condo. It had a living room with couches and a fireplace, a full kitchen, plus a separate bedroom. He poured us glasses of a delicious wine and we talked and hung out for a good long time before he made any moves whatsoever. I was still wondering if it might not happen.

Finally, he asked if I wanted a massage. Wow, a man who actually gives massages! So many promise or allude to it and never do! He was very good with his hands too, massaging my shoulders and back. Then he wanted me to straddle his lap for a kiss. I was starting to worry that he was going to want to be dominated, lol. He had made this comment on a previous date, asking about when I was going to make a move on him and that had kind of put me off. Like ugh, ME make a move on HIM? No thanks…

Anyhow, I obliged and did as he asked. His kisses were nice and he soon suggested a move to the bedroom.

In there, he turned into a BEAST. I kid you not, I was completely floored by the change in demeanor once the clothes came off! They came off quickly too, lol. He was complaining that I had too many on at first (it was a little chilly and I was wearing leggings under a skirt). He practically ripped my leggings and panties off before grabbing my legs and yanking me across the bed so he could attack my pussy with his tongue. He was gooood at that too!!

He licked and fingered me into ecstasy before telling me to take off the rest of my clothes and stripping off his own. I was all to happy to do as he asked and the minute he got on top of me the worries of him wanting a dominatrix were gone, lol. He was definitely the one in control and he was very good at what he was doing too!!

He had me in all kinds of positions and every one of them felt amazing! He was very dominant but very sweet and affectionate too, jusssst the way I like it! I couldn’t get enough of him! We kept going for hours and I gave him some really long blowjobs in there too, but he never did cum. Ah well, maybe next time… I could tell he was really enjoying himself and he was rock hard, but it didn’t happen.

The most surprising part though, was when he had me lying on my stomach on the bed, near the end. He had gone close to my asshole a few times, like he was thinking about anal and I’d kind of tensed up and let him know nonverbally that I didn’t really want to. He laughed it off and just went back to regular fucking.

This time though, after hours of great sex, I guess my reserve was worn down a little bit. It was so good I probably would have done anything he wanted at that point anyway. He got near there and I again flinched. He was holding my wrists and had me pinned on my stomach on the edge of the bed. This time he didn’t move away but started putting a lot of pressure on my ass with his dick, not actually going in. I tensed up, but didn’t say anything and he started kissing my neck and whispering in my ear until I relaxed. The very moment my body let go of control, he pushed his dick up my ass. I let out a gasp but I didn’t try to stop him.

There was no lube used or anything like that, but surprisingly it didn’t hurt. Granted everything was super wet down there already. He kept still like that for awhile and me pinned under him where I couldn’t wriggle away, letting me get used to the feel before he started to move. He was gentle at first, kissing my neck and he asked if I was okay a couple of times due to the whimpering but he didn’t stop and was fucking me progressively harder as time went on.

Like I said, he never came but he eventually let me up and was very affectionate afterwards. It was like 5 o’clock in the morning before I finally got up to go home and we never slept.

Its hard to describe how it made me feel. In a way it almost felt like he took my virginity. Only, I’ve had some anal experiences before but they didn’t last more than a few seconds and each of those was painful. This was different. I wouldn’t say I’d go out of my way to do it again, but I’m not entirely opposed to it either. I was a little sore the next day. My arms had bruises on them from where he was gripping me too.

The sex, and I’m not sure how much the anal affected it, overall, made me feel completely different about him than I did prior to sleeping together. During, and right after, I felt super submissive towards him. I was flooded with all those “in love” type chemicals and it even made me feel for awhile like I was over the Cohort. For days afterwards I was in a bit of a haze. I think I am finally past that part, but he is on a business trip and we have plans to meet up again soon. I’m going to have to be careful with this one!

Can you all keep a secret?

secrets1

I have a confession to make. This actually seems like an exceptionally weird time to make it, what with the Cohort seeming to have vanished, but it has been tumbling around in my head for quite some time. I’ve wanted to write something about it, but just haven’t been able to bring myself to admit this publicly.

You know how, on this blog, I’m always ranting and railing against Madonna/Whore and the unfair way men seem to act, wanting to fuck everything in sight, yet getting jealous when a woman shows ANY interest in another man? It always bothered me sooo much, until I fell for the Cohort. Somewhere in there, I had a moment of self discovery that was sort of disturbing.

I found out that, at least with him, in a way I never expected, it TURNED ME ON.

Now, the Cohort has always been fair, and kept his jealousies in check, realizing that a double standard in our situation would not be okay. He’s gotten a little jealous a couple of times, and he was real about it, but he also got himself under control without losing it. I respect that and I feel he is better than most in that area, actually.

I’m not even talking about jealousy from a man here, really, as its not hard for me to admit that it sometimes feels good to have a man get riled up enough to show he cares. No, I’m talking about me. I’m talking about ME getting turned on by what is maybe a combination of my own jealousy mixed with a little bit of playing on a man’s Madonna/whore.

I wrote a little bit in this blog, but not much, about how I went several months without sleeping with anyone but the Cohort. What I left out, is that, not only did I have almost no desire for other men (because I was so smitten with him), but that it was also, kind of…. turning me on? Something about the fact, that he was still sleeping with people, but I was not, was making me HOT.

What the fuck Lovergirl? Where is your head? Do you need me to smack you upside of it so you can think straight again? How could you get turned on by that? Didn’t it bother you??

All good questions, and I just… don’t know. Maybe I did completely lose my head. I was so wound up in my emotions that somehow it felt…GOOD.

Like one time, when he had gone off for a weekend of gangbanging, I remember feeling mildly threatened and jealous. Only it wasn’t too bad, because I knew it was not an emotional thing for him, just sexual. When he came back, he told me all about it.

I listened to his stories for a bit before he started kissing me and taking off my clothes. He whispered in my ear “but you, you haven’t had sex for awhile, have you?” I couldn’t even speak, I just shook my head no. I could tell it turned him on just as much as it did me, and the lovemaking that followed was incredibly intense. He was flooding me with affection that it felt like he’d been holding back for a long time, saving it all for me.

Not just then, but other times too. It just felt so good to feel like I was the only one on the recieving end of all that EMOTION, like he was reserving it for me, while I was reserving my body for him. Even at a party we went to, where he slept with three other women (and me with no one else, I wrote a bit about that one before), each time he would come to me afterwards for what felt like especially mind blowing sex. I loved feeling like I belonged to HIM, and him alone.

I guess that mostly ended after the first time I got pregnant. Maybe that was a big part of what lead up to that for us, subconsciously. Like he once commented, (referring to someone else) pregnancy is like the ultimate “handcuff”. After losing the baby(ies) I felt the need to use logic again and also be sleeping with other men, since we aren’t committed. I wanted to protect my heart, which was getting too involved.

Even now, I have been having a very hard time getting over the emotional hurdle of having sex with other men. I’ve slept with some, but I just can’t seem to open myself up. I’m holding back much more than usual.

All this has helped me understand, at least maybe a little more, the whole cuckhold phenomenon. I’ve always found it kind of baffling, but maybe I get it more than I want to admit, from my own angle. Did you know that there are females that are into that and they are called cuckqueens? You don’t hear a whole lot about that, but I wonder if it is more common than we realize.

It seems like, the little bit you can find online about that sort of thing though, is filled with levels of degradation and humiliation that make me feel uncomfortable. I’m not all about that. For me I guess, it’s something different.

Like at the parties before, he has done things like had me suck his dick before he went off and fucked someone else, but nothing about it felt bad. I knew he was coming back to me, tenfold, afterwards.

I once sort of shared my feelings about all this with the Cohort, over a short text. We didn’t talk about it in depth but he brought it up on Valentine’s Day, during my miscarriage and while we were eating at a pizzeria. It wasn’t a good time and I kind of just denied it all and looked away. He tends to probe my feelings and reactions more deeply, but this time he just looked at me quizically and didn’t comment. I think he knows.

It’s just one of those things that is very hard to talk about. It’s like admitting you feel okay with that can be very shameful and embarrassing. I think, with the Cohort, my level of emotional safety was so much higher that I felt I could drop my guard and just be who I am. He would lightly tease me about things of that nature or jokingly call me his “slut slave” but he never took it too far.

There is something super intimate though, about taking it to a deeper level that way. I miss him so much. 😦 At least you all are getting some good writing out of this! 😉

It’s raining men! :D

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Wow, so much going on lately it is getting hard to keep up with my blog! Nevertheless, I am determined to keep you all up to date. Life in Lovergirl Land has been pretty interesting.

I’ll start with my latest adventures with the Cohort. He has been a lot of fun to hang out with. This guy keeps me laughing and laughing when I am with him. Last night we went out to a couple of vanilla bars together with some of his non-lifestyle friends and had a great time, as well as a night full of good sex and conversation.

He’s very emotionally honest and tells me what he is thinking and feeling. I’m really liking that a lot. It was especially helpful when we went to our first swinger party together.

I was on my period and we decided beforehand that the most I would do, would be give blowjobs, to him or anyone else. The party was small, only about 30 people, and I didn’t end up playing with anyone other than him, but it wasn’t because of him trying to hold me back. He says he is going to try to make a point not to do that, even though sometimes he wonders how it would make him feel to watch me have sex with someone else.

At the party, there was a woman that he sometimes plays with, who is married. They started out playing with her husband around, but she has snuck over to his place to play over her lunch break and that makes him feel a little guilty. She sucked his dick at the party, as did I, but it wasn’t to completion. No one has ever made him cum with a blow job anyhow, but he says that knowing I was there and unable to play, made him feel a little awkward too.

It honestly didn’t bother ME at all and I don’t think would have if he fucked her there. Of course he had no way of knowing that for sure, but I was okay. I felt bad that I was on my period and unable to fuck him there that night, so may have even liked to see him be able to get off.

The only thing that irked me that night, was the Host. He was at the party, with another woman, and never even bothered to say hi. I only saw her from across the room, but she didn’t look all that cute or anything. He later claimed I had my back turned and he thought I was ignoring HIM. I’m not really buying that, but whatever.

Its hard to say what his actual reasons were. I guess it could have been anything, from jealousy over the Cohort, to just being an asshole. He has since texted me, and I didn’t even respond. I don’t hate him or anything but wonder if I should drop him off my list of current men.

It’s just offensive that he didn’t say hi. It’s not like the two of us don’t know each other, and I don’t think he’s embarrassed of me. I mean he had me helping him host his parties! Now I hear the Redhead is doing that instead. She’s also been super buddy-buddy with the old guy and his wife that I wasn’t wanting to fuck. Good for her, I’m just not attracted.

He still wants to fuck me, and hits me up over text, but I’m not trying to be fuck buddies with someone who doesn’t give me basic acknowledgement in public. It would be different if he were married or something, but he’s not. I don’t know. It’s still up in the air because I do like the sex and he is conveniently close, but I don’t want to have to stoop down low to do it.

Speaking of the Redhead, she told me a crazy story. This guy, who had been texting me for a little bit, and with whom she used to have a couples profile with, made threats to her, and she had to get a restraining order against him and have him thrown in jail for a short time. He’s the one that was sending me countless needy texts, that I had to ask to quit bothering me. Yay, for my stalker sense going into high gear, and Mr. Firm advising me to drop him like a hot potato! 😉

Okay, now speaking of THIS guy (the Psycho Stalker), the Pilot and I met with HIS brother, and his brother’s wife the other day. We were thinking couple swap, but the Pilot said he didn’t want to have any expectations.

They are a cute couple, in their mid twenties, good looking and we had a good time, but nobody got naked. Well, that’s not entirely true. The Pilot and I fucked in the bathroom of their apartment and then again in the parking lot, but they didn’t join in the fun.

We spent our time playing parlour games, drinking and chatting, and once the guy offered me a molly. I declined…I’ve never done those and don’t want to. Now that I’m a mom I pretty much avoid doing any drugs and stick to a few glasses of alcohol. I’m not judging those that do and back in the day I smoked my share of pot, plus tried a few other things, just now I don’t mess with it.

After we left the guy was texting “why did you two leave, my wife and I wanted to play with you guys”. :p I wasn’t really that surprised, but it was annoying that no one made the first move. It IS kind of awkward when there are two couples, because then who is supposed to do it? If one of the men starts going after the female half of the other couple, it runs a risk of someone getting upset. So I do kind of understand. Yet, neither she nor I, is the type to get aggressive with a guy and start things off.

The Pilot was kissing on ME, pulling me onto his lap and obviously showing interest in SOMETHING going on (plus they had to know we were fucking in the bathroom) but the other guy and his wife weren’t touching each other. So that made it less likely too. Like if they had been making out as well, maybe somehow we could have gotten things going.

Mr. Firm says in those types of scenarios, he just starts getting naked, lol. He’s so awesome. 🙂 I saw him the other day too and WOW!!!! THE SEX, OMFG, it is BEYOND amazing!! I don’t even know how it’s possible, but it seemed even better than before!!

He’s at that scary level, like the kind that Alexyss Tylor warns about in her Penis Power videos, that I talked about before. I’d better watch out! LOL 😉 That man could have me acting all kinds of a fool, if he wanted to.

Even one time, during the sex, he had me bent over on my hands and knees, and was making me cum from fucking me doggystyle, as well as with his hand rubbing on my clit. I was so overloaded with pleasure, I was about to tap out, and he kinda laughed and said “you don’t even know what to do, do you?” Yeeahhh…. He knows!! 😉

Thankfully, he seems to be a man that can be trusted with all that power. I’m so impressed with him as a person and with how he treats me, and responds to me. I haven’t got a single negative thing to say. If I’m going to lose control with anyone, I want it to be him. 😉

Now for the Poly guy. The plot thickens. I swear he has got to be married!

He had me meet him the other day, at lunch time, so he could give me one of his employee gas cards to drive my kids to their dads house. Guess where we met? At the girlfriends place again. Only this time she wasn’t there.

I asked him about it and he said he owns 5 rental houses. She lives in one of them and he stays there “some of the time”. He said he likes his privacy so he doesn’t always.

One seemingly random thing that stands out to me about some of these men is that they all seem to have rental houses! Mr. Firm, the Pilot, the Married Man and Mr. Poly, all have rental properties. Guys that have rental properties are probably fucking like crazy. Now I have to wonder if they are all fucking IN the rental homes…. 😉

In her house he has a playroom. Its an extra bedroom with its own lock and key (the house has 5 bedrooms). According to him they are planning on putting in cameras, so she can watch him fuck women from the other room, if she wants to, and also record if the people agree to it. They have toys and restraints and stuff in there too, he said, though I didn’t see any of it.

He said that other women have to “earn” the right to be in her bedroom with them, like I was the other night, but that he knew she liked me, so he brought me in. Uhhh..if you say so, but seriously, don’t I just feel soooo special “earning” the special right to play in their bedroom? Pssshhh…

While she is gone he has agreed only to fuck women in the playroom. They have all these “rules” and honestly to me, it is an annoyance. Maybe if he wasn’t flat out telling me, but it doesn’t make me feel all that great. Its almost like “know your place, you are just a secondary” and that is kind of offensive.

Oh, and he keeps planning these big nights out over the weekend, then cancels. Married man kind of flakiness, I’m telling you. That and he often doesn’t answer a text in the evenings but he’s hounding me during the day and spending money on me. Hmmmmm….

In any case, it left me free to have a fun night with the Cohort, followed by breakfast at the IHOP in the morning. We stayed up all night long and barely got any sleep. Good times, and he was killing me pointing out the folks who looked like they were doing the walk of shame there, haha.

Thank God I was able to get a shower in the morning. I’m exhausted though and supposed to meet with the guy who took me out to the art walk a few weeks ago. He is grilling steaks for us this afternoon. Ta- ta for now!

Getting a little risque ;)

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This has been quite a week for me, sexually. I usually don’t have the time to have sex as often as I would like, but I got kinda lucky with free babysitting (yay for family!) and I kind of went to town.

I’ve also agreed to do some telephone work for the Married Man’s business, from home, so of course I needed to meet with him first. You know, to do “business”. 😉

I started off Sunday with a date and sex with a new guy that I have told you all about already. He’s the one who knows my friend. Since we are both being sneaky with our down low behaviors, I’ll refer to him as “The Cohort”.

Tuesday was my first trip to a casino. The casino itself, well, let’s be real, I thought it was pretty boring. How on earth do people get addicted to this? Granted, we only played the slot machines, but sheesh. All you do is sit there and push a button or pull a lever and the cash you are using just disappears, or you get a slip of paper with an amount on it. I won some, but lost more, and eventually stopped, after blowing about $100 of this guy’s money. He was cool with that.

He had gotten a room at the casino hotel and went in ahead of time, to get it all set up, with candles and wine glasses. Unfortunately, he was having some trouble with opening the cork on the wine bottle and it was pissing him off, lol. We ended up drinking vodka and red bull.

Then we fucked on the bed. He wanted to talk a lot before, and after, and says he wants to know everything there is about me. He wore a condom, and the sex was pretty good, but didn’t last long, maybe 5-10 minutes. He didn’t go down on me and I didn’t give him a blowjob.

According to him, he has been seeing this woman that he is in a poly relationship with, for 3 years. He calls himself an “alpha male” and said that she doesn’t fuck any other men but sometimes likes to just watch him with women, or participate. We will refer to him as “Mr. Poly”, even though it’s debatable if it’s really “poly” when it’s one sided like that.

I’m supposed to meet her (and him) for brunch tomorrow. We will see how that goes! It’s kind of interesting anyhow.

Wednesday, I spent with The Cohort again, at his house, fucking for a good couple of hours. It was pretty darn good, even better than the last time. According to him, he is a person that likes to fuck the same woman over and over again, because he says it keeps getting better. He wants to see me regularly. So far he is easy to get along with and talk to, so it sounds like fun.

I got back pretty late. My baby brother had stopped by late in the evening because he was in town and I left him with the kids while I took off. So the next morning I was TIRED, lol, but it didn’t stop me for going to talk with my new “boss”. 😉 😉

I was supposed to meet with the Married Man, Thursday morning, at his house, to pick up some paperwork, so I can get started doing my “job”. Of course, I knew it would be more than that. 😉

He lives in a big, 3200 square foot, historical home, deep in the city. His house is very nice and the decor was quite “artsy”, almost like being in a museum or gallery, with antiques and other interesting stuff to look at. Some of the surrounding neighborhood is kind of iffy though. It’s a mix of renovated homes like his, and not-so-renovated, falling apart, ghetto looking places. There was graffiti all over the stop signs around his house and shady looking apartments nearby. I noticed the security system while I was sitting on the couch and saw what may have been a camera, in the corner of the ceiling.

He had a pit bull puppy sitting in a crate by the front door, but it didn’t bark when I entered. I sat on the couch and looked around while he went upstairs to get a file folder for me. I wondered where his wife was. I have no idea what she does for a living but I am assuming she works outside the home.

After explaining what I would need to do and handing me a couple of papers to take home, he suddenly pulled me up off the couch for a kiss. Almost as quickly, and quite roughly, he turned me around, shoved me onto my knees and pulled out his cock for me to suck. Then he practically threw me, face forward, onto the couch, and yanked down my pants and panties, entering me from behind. He was fucking me fast and furiously, I could barely grab a hold of the back of the leather couch to keep from falling over.

A few minutes later, he nearly knocked me down on my back, pushing my legs up over my head, my pants still only halfway down. He saw the fear on my face and promised not to tear my pants, lol, ripping one leg off while the other was still flailing about, as he kept going hard.

Eventually we did get them all the way off, as well as my boots, blouse and bra, but it took awhile, lol. He would slow down and talk to me occassionally, asking questions like whether or not I would fuck his wife? I was like um, yeah, probably and he asked if I had seen her. When he and I were Facebook friends I had seen her pic, so I said yes. He laughed and said “yeah, she would KILL me!”

He was like “have you ever fucked a married man at his house before?” and I said no. He later told me he had never fucked anyone like that at HIS house either, I guess implying he’s fucked married women in THEIR homes. A couple of times he told me “you know we can’t be doing this right, now that you work for me?” Yeah sure, lmao. 😉 Then he asked me if he was bigger than “all those white guys” I have been fucking. I was thinking, what white guys??? LOL But I played along. 😉

At one point there was a sound at the front door and I startled, but it was only the dog, moving around in it’s crate. He said where we needed to worry about was the back door, where their driveway is. Another time, he had jumped up to look out the back window, lifting the blinds. Then he told me to come over that way, setting me up on his kitchen table to fuck right in front of the open window!

He was still being pretty aggressive at that point, then pulled out and got down to eat my pussy while I was naked on his kitchen table, in front of the window. He came back up and slowly thrust inside me for a minute, looking me in the eyes, before picking me up off the table, setting me down in front of him and grabbing my hair, pushing my head up onto his dick as he came in my mouth. I swallowed every last drop. 😉

The funny thing is, I never came. It was hot but I think I was too alert and on edge to relax enough to do that. As we were looking around for bits of my clothing and my missing panties (which we finally found under the couch), I warned him to make sure there weren’t any strands of my hair laying about. His wife is black and I have long hair with streaks of blonde in it. I think it would be pretty obvious, eek! He saw me off and kissed me goodbye. We will see if that happens again…

Friday night I went out with another new guy. He took me to the art walk downtown and we had a good time even though I wasn’t feeling that attracted to him. We met on Craigslist and he had referred to himself as “well above average looking”. Um…no. :p

I almost backed out of fucking him. I just wasn’t feeling him and didn’t really want him to kiss me. I insisted on a condom and he didn’t have one so he had to run to the gas station. Beforehand, he had me suck him off and tried to cum in my mouth but I kind of spit it out. It was very fast, and while he was gone I debated just ditching, but decided to stay.

I’m kind of glad I did because he was actually pretty good in the sack. He was ESPECIALLY good at going down on me and made me cum a few different times like that. He was quite dominant as well and the sex wasn’t half bad. I’m not sure at this point about the future. He clearly wants to see me again.

He does have an on again/off again girlfriend who he says never wants to fuck. According to him though, he is fucking 4 different married women on the side and also suggested that we get together with one of his male friends for a threesome because they like to sometimes “go half” on women.

I don’t know though, I guess I will see. I’m iffy on this one. In any case, whew! Wonder what next week will look like?? I’m honestly having kind of a hard time keeping up with all the guys that want to see me right now. Maybe its a good thing that my phone still isn’t getting all my texts, it helps keep things at bay. :p

 

Keeping it in the family

wayans brothers

 

So here I am in bed, kissing this complete stranger that Mr. Host had sent in to “take care of” me, another one of his cousins.  I was a bit peeved at Mr. Host, not only for ignoring me, but now he was giving me to someone else to fuck?  It was confusing, yet, I was excited too. 

The new guy was hot, better looking than either of his other cousins, and I liked his demeanor.  I was turned on by the concept, that I was about to fuck this guy I had never even met.  I wasn’t about to say no.

He was kissing me, one hand in my hair and the other between my legs, rubbing against the satin fabric.  He said “you’ve got a phat pussy under there, I can feel it.  I can’t wait to be inside you”.  He pulled off his boxers and tugged at my pajama pants, letting me take them, and my top, the rest of the way off, as he slid on a condom.  “I am looking forward to seeing this big, black, dick against that white skin” he said, as he watched me undress.

“It’s been a long time since I’ve fucked a white girl” he claimed as he was sliding his way in.  “MMMmmm, I can’t keep my hands out your hair…and you have such beautiful eyes.”  “God, you are so fucking tight”.  He kept telling me he couldn’t believe his good luck, happening to have stopped by at his cousin’s house.

The sex was good.  He was well endowed, though not exceptionally so.  You could tell he knew what he was doing.  Halfway through he was saying “this pussy is so good, I am definitely getting your number” and talking about how he wanted to come down to see me on his motorcycle.  He was thrilled when I told him I’ll be moving up that way soon.

At some point, not long after we started, I heard someone in the hallway, using the restroom.  You could hear a door open and close and the fan being turned on.  It made me wonder who was out there?  Had the Host and those other people even left?

After having me bend over on my hands and knees for a bit, he flipped me onto my back and said “I’m gonna fuck that ass now”.  I said “No, no, no, I don’t want that” and he was like “are you sure?  I seen it winking at me”.  I laughed “NO, it was definitely not winking at you”. He teased “oh yes it was, I saw when you were bent over the bed, it was giving me the eye”.  I said I’d done it before I just don’t like it.  His response was “you just haven’t been with a man who knows how to do it right”.  “But I bet all the guys say that to you, don’t they?” He laughed.  I said yep, that is exactly what they say!  Lmao.

He said my pussy was good enough that he wasn’t gonna really care one way or the other, and went back to fucking me again.  Towards the end he asked if it was okay to cum on my face and I said just don’t get it in my eyes.  So he pulled out and was pretending to spell out his initials on my face with his dick as he came, lmao.  He was like “I’ve gotta leave my mark on that”.

He cuddled with me for a bit and asked if I’d fucked the Host yet tonight.  I said no, and he couldn’t believe he’d let him come in there first.  He took down my number and texted my phone.  Then he left the room to go get a drink out of his car. 

He came back with a lemon iced tea for me that he said he’d just bought at the gas station before he came over.  He said he’d gone downstairs and seen the Host was fucking someone.  I asked who and he said he thought it was that same woman from earlier.  She was riding him and the Host had beckoned him over with his hand.  The cousin said he wasn’t sure if he meant for him to come join in or go get me but that he’d rather just be up here with me alone.

I was surprised the Host was fucking her.  I’m not sure why, I guess I should have assumed that he would be.  She wasn’t unattractive or anything, though she was in her 40’s and maybe a little worn looking.  She was tall and blonde and skinny. 

I guess that’s why he sent the cousin into me.  I’d certainly rather fuck him than the hillbilly guy, any day.  Plus, he DID ask if I had gotten my fun in and probably assumed I’d been fucking more than I had at the party.  Who knows what Mr. Hillbilly was doing?  Watching?  Passed out?  Haha

Anyhow, I fucked Mr. Cousin again (I might have to change his name later if I see him again, I don’t want any newbies to my blog to get confused or too many people finding it searching for incest stories, lmao).  This time he pulled the condom off towards the end and went right back in.  Totally defeats the purpose there, but not the first time a guy has pulled that!

After we were finished (and he again came on my face) he wanted to talk a lot.  He asked if I wanted to come with him to some jazz bar that was open till 6 am and eat catfish.  Normally, that might sound good, but I was tired and ready to sleep.

He was telling me all about how he and the Host and their other cousins have been sharing females since they were in high school.  He said his first sexual experience was actually a MFM threesome.  According to him though, it had been awhile since he’d shared someone with Mr. Host, specifically, and he has never been to a swinger party.

He said he makes a point of not judging women because then they open up to him a lot more.  I agreed that was true and admitted that I had grown up with a family that operated similarly, with the brothers/cousins all fucking the same women.

 The guy I had the affair with was from that same family, though I had promised him during that time I wouldn’t fuck his brothers.  We weren’t at the point where he wanted to share any longer and I would stay away from most of them these days, for various reasons.  I admit to laughing a couple of years ago when one of them posted on Facebook that all he wants is to find just ONE woman that hasn’t fucked any of his brothers or cousins, and all the responses were like “have you thought about moving to Alaska?” lol. 

 He finally left around 5:30 and I heard the Host and his company getting ready to leave a few minutes later.  I knew they’d have a 20 minute or so drive each way, so I drifted back to sleep.

I was awoken by Mr. Host climbing on my back and kissing my neck.  I peeked at the clock, 6:30, but pretended to be asleep.  I was still irritated with him.  I lay completely still and didn’t move.

He slid off my pj pants and started gently biting his way up my thighs and on the underside of my ass.  I didn’t budge.  So he spread my legs open and quickly entered me from behind.  I gasped and he whispered in my ear “are you ready for your 30 seconds?” I said “what. ever.” and we had great sex for like the next hour, twice, before falling asleep.  He was saying stuff like “who’s number 1? Tell me I’m number 1″…and promising that he is going to make the sex different each time so I’ll be sure to keep coming back for more.

He woke me up with more doggystyle sex, which was pretty good, cumming inside me, because again, he’s got a vasectomy.  I started my period the next day, thank God, so we know that other guy who came in me didn’t get me pregnant.

 Anyhow, it’s hard to stay mad and he later claimed that the reason he left me alone at the second party was to let me be and let me enjoy myself.  I don’t know about all THAT, but whatever.  I still had fun and it’s not worth the drama at this point.  Just have to be careful to keep myself emotionally distant.